Photo Credit: Mike Coppola/Getty Images for Billboard

Between the tragic Manchester bombings and the passing of Mac Miller, you could say Ariana Grande has been to hell and back these last few years. Not only is this queen still standing, she’s STRUTTING!!! In 6-inch stilettos hunny.

Grande sat down with Rob Haskell for this month’s Vogue, to detail how she literally said Thank U, Next in the wake of tragedy.

 

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thanks for allowing me to be in the background of toulouse’s first Vogue cover @voguemagazine photo by Annie Leibovitz story by Rob Haskell 🖤 thank you to the incredible @tonnegood @thejoshliu @hannah_murray1 @sergiokletnoy

A post shared by Ariana Grande (@arianagrande) on Jul 9, 2019 at 6:16am PDT

After Miller’s passing, Grande says her friends encouraged to get out the house and into the studio. And just like that—out of her grief, much like a Phoenix from it’s ashes, her album was born. “I don’t remember those months of my life because I was (a) so drunk and (b) so sad,” she started. “I don’t really remember how it started or how it finished, or how all of a sudden there were 10 songs on the board. I think that this is the first album and also the first year of my life where I’m realizing that I can no longer put off spending time with myself, just as me. I’ve been boo’d up my entire adult life. I’ve always had someone to say goodnight to. So Thank U, Next was this moment of self-realization. It was this scary moment of ‘Wow, you have to face all this stuff now. No more distractions. You have to heal all this shit.’ ”

She calls her grief over Mac’s passing “pretty all consuming”. Then, so raw and so genuinely, she explains their relationship; “By no means was what we had perfect, but, like, f***. He was the best person ever, and he didn’t deserve the demons he had. I was the glue for such a long time, and I found myself becoming…less and less sticky. The pieces just started to float away.”

While on her Thank U, Next tour videos surfaced of Grande breaking down on stage. The videos were accompanied by messages of love and support from fans.  The “7 Rings” singer is currently on two back-to-back tours promoting her albums Sweetener and Thank U, Next that were released just six months apart from each other. This girl is the definition of a WERK-a-holic.

In the caption under one of her recent Instagram posts she addresses her fans, “i feel everything very intensely and have committed to doing this tour during a time in my life when i’m still processing a lot … so sometimes i cry a lot! i thank you for accepting my humanness.” What she may not know though is…killer dance moves, powerhouse vocals aside, her humanness is what truly makes her the queen she is.

Grande has been through more tragedy and trauma than anyone should at her age. On top of balancing and maintaining a booming career. And yet, here she is. Doing the damn thing. On the cover of freaking Vogue, taking it day by day ,and being real af about the process. And THAT is the kind of glow up that we have no choice but to stan!

 

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tour is wild. life is wild. i’m grateful for the sea of love i have around me everyday and for the people who come to these shows and give all of us every ounce of energy they’ve got. i’m grateful to work with the best musicians and dancers in the world. i’m grateful for my voice and my team. i’m grateful for this music. i’m grateful for my tour bus driver, Kurt who bought me pickles yesterday because he saw we ran out. i’m grateful for the opportunity to sing to thousands of people every night. it’s a dream come true. no matter how hard it gets or how many feelings come up that are screaming at me to be processed and sorted through one day, i’m grounded by gratitude and promise not to give up on what i’ve started. i feel everything very intensely and have committed to doing this tour during a time in my life when i’m still processing a lot … so sometimes i cry a lot! i thank you for accepting my humanness. i’m not sure what i did to deserve to meet so many loving souls every night / to feel so much love, but i want you to know that it really does carry me through. i feel it and i appreciate it. and all of you so much. i’m sharing this because i’m grateful and because i want you to know that if you too are hurting, you can push through and are not alone. it is hard to balance taking care of the people around you, doing your job, and healing / taking care of yourself at the same time… but i want you to know, you aren’t alone and i think you’re doing great. love you.

A post shared by Ariana Grande (@arianagrande) on Jul 7, 2019 at 1:10pm PDT

Ariana partnered with Vogue to release a special visual of her song “In My Head”, a track about her relationship with the late Miller. Watch below: